Dearest sister,

Greetings and blessings of the here and now. The only time there is!

Life is indeed full of opportunities and challenges, and physical pain is a combination of both.

Pain is an indication of where we are out of balance and it can move us toward discovery and wholeness.

Pain in the vulva is very primal, and it can effect every aspect of our being.

In Hebrew the word for ‘womb’ is ‘rechem’. It is the same word for ‘compassion’ (come-passion). The source from which we all come, a source of most profound pleasure, and a storage center for our hurts, confusion, abuse, and pain.

As a culture, our western civilization is full of pathology (disease / dis-ease) regarding our sexuality. It is a source of our profanity and full of shame, guilt, and confusion.

Why is it ok in our culture to view violence as entertainment

and our sense and sex as profane?

Women (as well as men) are treated as objects and there is little integration of our sex and spirit.

Most of our sexual confusion is based on ignorance, and it really isn’t anybody’s ‘fault’. Sex and sin is the message we continually receive, our collective baggage of human history.

(read his-story!)

We are ‘sexual’ beings in the womb! Infants are born with the capacity for ‘orgasm‘!

What did our Creator have in mind?

Until we are unashamed and comfortable with our pleasure,  we will have to bear the burdens of our confusion and pain.

So, with this pain in your most intimate parts, share some quiet time with yourself. Ask your Creator to help you discover you! (Remember: you did not make you!) I believe we each have a team of angels guiding us. Our Creator would never abandon us. Learn to listen and communicate with your most innermost self.

“so too!, explore thyself. Therein thyself shall find. The ‘undiscovered continent‘, no settler had in mind.” (emily Dickinson)

A quiet room, candle light. or a safe place in nature. A time for you to be with you, and your innermost thoughts and feelings.

Place one hand on your heart. The other hand over your “yoni” (the Sanskrit word for vulva) breathe..deeply and fully into your lower abdomen and sex.

Come from a deep place in wishing the best for you.

Ask your ‘spirit guides’ or Creator what is the source of this pain. And be prepared to ‘listen’, to cry, to have emotions and feelings come up that might surprise you.

Religious indoctrination, cultural confusion, misconceptions, sexual, physical and emotional abuses play heavily in vulva pain.(Also tampon allergy and yeast.)

Be gentle with yourself. Be prepared to truly want the best for yourself and do not fear your physical body.

 “I will be gentle with myself. I will love myself. “I am a part of the universe”

At some point during this process, you will want to reach inside your yoni with your fingers (lubrication is essential: Flax-clove juice, olive oil, some oil of rosemary added to the lubricant in small amounts, 10 drops of rosemary in a half cup of flax or oil, note recipe below.)

Find the tender places inside. Gently press with your fingertips, breathe into the area, massage the tender point with mild pressure, and slow gentle circles. The awareness here is to acknowledge the point of pain, open the area with your breath and conscious awareness, allow the space of breath, compassion, and tenderness to fill the place of pain. And open to another dimension.

Breathe the breath of life.

Open towards the light. .

healing, tenderness, gentleness and mercy.

Love, forgiveness, balance, equanimity.

Whenever we get an injury. That injury needs attention, a washing, a band-aid, some ice, some heat, some affection, caring. Why should our sex be any different?

But if we put off caring for injured ‘private parts’ than the pain builds till it is constant, burning, and throbbing. And all other sensations take a back seat to its intensity.

We spend a lot of time running around to doctors and healers, forgetting our own inner potential and our relationship with our God.

Our relationship with our Creator is our foundation ‘love affair.’

That is why when many people experience orgasm they shout “Oh God !” It’s a reminder to us that these feelings are within us, it doesn’t even have to involve another human being!! They are the stirrings within me that are a part of Thee. Passionate, playful, purposeful, and prayerful.

 Loving is engaging the sacred.

 Holiness and wholeness in all our holes.

Do not be afraid to touch yourself, and discover your inner parts, you know exactly where your pain is, and with breath, gentleness and loving awareness you can bring healing light into the dark places.

 Forgive yourself for not knowing or sharing your real thoughts and feelings.

As you acknowledge the hurt places, visualize light filling the area. Every now and then stroke, touch, tickle, the pleasure center of your clitoris.  It will help deepen your breathing and assist in transformation. Balance with breath, attention and intention.

Our most sensitive parts require our most sensitive participation. Love and forgiveness are the most powerful tools for our healing.

Vulvodynia is a growing problem in our culture because we separate our sex from spirit.

It is all with reason and purpose. Pleasure is our birthright.

The purpose of our lives is to love one another. To touch and to heal and to learn and to grow in peace. HalleluYah!

May thy Creator guide thy hands and heart towards paths of healing and wholeness.

Blessings ……


3 tablespoons whole flax seeds

2 cups water

1/8 to 1/4 cup whole cloves (cloves numb tissue temporarily. one of nature’s anesthetics)

Bring to a boil..Turn down heat..Simmer for 6 minutes..

Turn off heat..Let sit for 6 minutes..Strain through a strainer..into a glass container..Add 20 drops of rosemary oil..Shake well.

Keep refrigerated..Use daily for vaginal massage and strengthening of tissue.